Emotional Inventory: Age 13

It is time to walk through another season of healing. As I began writing out the emotional inventory of my life, I was led to begin with age thirteen. The first thing that came to mind was this being the year my virginity was lost. As I wrote out the story, I really did not relive emotions from that night. Once I finished the story, I recalled feelings I had before, during, and after that intimate night with a man who was five years older than me; a man who never loved me. I finally did break down and cry. Friends sent encouraging words and scripture as I ventured into this dark time of my life.

"God is with you through this, Cherie."

Though I slept well, I woke the next day with angst in my heart. All I seemed to do was complain. I ended up lashing out at two dear friends. As I reached out and apologized to them, it became clear to me what was happening. These deep-seeded emotions had risen in me, and I was trying to figure out how to process them. The thing is, we are not supposed to process these things on our own. Jesus is my companion; the lover of my soul. His Spirit it within me, and all I have to do is seek Him through prayer, praise, or worship, and the light shines into the darkness. As I continued through the rest of my work day, I kept my praise and worship music going. This always helps calm the soul.

✞ Jesus is so amazing, my friends ♥ Holy Spirit sent so many to pray for me, call me, and encourage me. His love poured upon me through so many brothers and sisters ♥ God's love covered me into the night. As I rested and meditated on the emotions rising from my 'age 13 inventory', the Holy Spirit used three different people on Facebook to speak the same message.

One friend posted Psalm 139:7-10. We had a wonderful time connecting this scripture to the theme of The Runaway Bunny.

“Where can I go from your Spirit?

Where can I flee from your presence?

If I go up to the heavens, you are there;

If I make my bed in the depths, you are there.

If I rise on the wings of the dawn,

If I settle on the far side of the sea,

Even there your hand will guide me,

Your right hand will hold me fast.”

Psalm 139:7-10

Right after that, another friend posted v5-6 from the very same Psalm! "You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand!"

Then a friend from church sent me an ecard which read, "When you think you are alone, there is always a Shepherd next to you." How true is this?!

So... I went to bed with the Holy Spirit ministering to my heart in such a lovely way. God is with us. I will not ever deny that. His power is too real to deny the truth in the Spirit and in the Word.

Upon waking the next morning, God's love continued with a song over me, "Your Love Never Fails". I was actually singing these lyrics when I woke, "there may be pain in the night, but joy comes in the morning..your love never fails".

The first line in this beautiful song of worship starts, "Nothing can separate, even if I ran away. Your love never fails." It goes with the Runaway Bunny message and Psalm 139!!

So, no matter what, we are never alone in these open seas. When the oceans rage, His love covers us and sustains us. I see now the significance of praising him through the storms.